Growing up as the descendent of a Residential School Survivor was not easy, and I've often wondered who my people were. My mom never talked about any family, having known very little about them herself.
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The amount of healing I’ve experienced has helped grow my passion for sobriety, recovery, life, and love. Living sober has evoked so much more than just putting down the pipe.
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At that moment, I looked up the empty street to my left and then to my right. In that second, I found myself thinking, “This is your home. This is where you live, here on these streets.”
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A favorite saying my old self used to say was, “If I am going to lose something, I want to feel it”. This may as well have been my life’s motto for the past two and a half decades.
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From the first day I arrived I was so honored to have been chosen among a small group to attend and help prepare the land for this very special ceremony.
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While I don't have many memories before the age of eight, I remember being woken up in the middle of the night by my mum, who handed me a garbage bag with instructions to put in my favourite toys and make it quick.
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I often picture myself in a boxing ring with addiction, getting beaten to a pulp. My corner had thrown in the towel years ago, but I was unable to walk away from the fight.
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When I first arrived at Simon House, I didn’t know what I was doing. I didn’t know I was an addict. I had ego, but no drive. I was a truly just a wandering soul.
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Today I start my day every day by asking what I can give to the world and how I can help people instead of what I can take and who I can manipulate.
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I spent the better part of the last 15 years trapped in a literal waking nightmare hooked on drugs and a slave to my addiction.
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A part of me genuinely wanted to get help and get sober, but another part felt like I didn't deserve it. I believed that all the horrible things I'd done and all the innocent people I'd hurt in doing so meant that it wasn't worth it for me to become sober.
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I held this delusion that once I finished treatment, I'd be fixed and could go back to my old way of living. Insanity. I had to learn the hard way that in treatment, I'm learning to be a new person— the person God intended me to be.
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Being honest about what I needed in my recovery, and my transition has been the best decision and now I have opportunities to help others like myself and I can’t wait to see what the future holds for me.
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My addiction led me down a very dark path. All the lines in the sand I told myself I would never cross, well eventually, I crossed them.
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After 18 years of self-destruction, I did what most people would think is an effortless task; I picked up the phone and called Simon House.
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Hitting my bottom made me realize that I needed help. Serious injury or death was upon me, and a change was necessary to stay alive.
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Traffic was slow-moving through Bowness that day due to the ongoing construction, and I now found myself stuck at a light. As I was waiting to go, I noticed horns blaring, and it was pretty unusual to hear, so I looked around.
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Before Simon House, I felt like I had hit rock-bottom and was very ashamed of myself for disappointing my family, friends, and everyone I was associated with.
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